I think most men hope that if they end up in a hospital they’ll be getting a sponge bath from a nurse from OnlyTease:
Reality might be a little different, even though, I’ve seen some fine looking nurses in my time, but you also run the risk of getting something that looked like it crawled out of a swamp. The other thing is what medical condition would have you in the hospital and still well enough to be fully functioning. I’ve decided that your appendix being removed is probably the safest bet, but I don’t know how badly that would hurt, so, hmm, okay I’ll need to think on this some more or just get a nurse’s uniform and hope some fine lady will put it on.